Rule No. 1: Don’t be too emotional : Chapter 41

You call it madness but I call it love.

Don Byas

He went still. His breath hitched slightly, but beneath that stunned silence, a mixture of shock and joy shone clearly in his eyes. Though it appeared for only a flash before vanishing, I caught it in time-l wasn’t mistaken. He pursed his lips and averted his gaze to his iPad, scrolling through it rapidly, answering in a voice he tried to keep flat.

“I don’t think that has anything to do with this job interview.”

“You don’t have to say it. Your eyes answer everything.” I smiled.” They say the eyes are the window to the soul. Gaze doesn’t lie.”

“Alright, alright. Let’s just say we’ll see each other in two weeks, after you finished all the courses. You know you have to move in, right? I’ll send the address via Line,” he spoke so loudly and fast l feared his tongue might tangle. I couldn’t stop smiling, seeing him lose his composure.

“Oh, so we’re going to start chatting on Line now?”

“It’s for work.”

“And did I say we were going to talk about anything else?” I kept smiling. P’Jane bit his lip and rubbed his browbefore standing up.

“Stay here. I’ll tell the staff to print the contract for you to sign.”” Yes, sir.” He walked away to the internal phone. I finished my apple juice and tried to flatten my expression. I hadn’t expected to be that bold; it just came out naturally. Even if he didn’t accept it, he didn’t deny it. Does that mean I have hope? A moment later, he brought the fresh contract and laid it before me, pulling a Montblanc pen from his shirt pocket. I truly didn’t understand how just the act of pulling out a pen could look so incredibly cool.
I read every line thoroughly before signing both sets. Then, I slid them back to my brand-new employer. He leaned over and signed with a flourish. It was the first time I’d seen his signature; even his handwriting looked expensive. It was the first time we’d made a contract like normal humans-not a “blood contract” like before.

“We’re done for today. Do you need the restroom before you go?”

“Oh, no thank you.”

“I’ll walk you out.” We walked to the suite door in silence. Only the sound of my heart echoed in my chest. I thought he’d leave me at the door or the elevator, but no-he stepped into the lift with me, clearly intending to see me to the car. The silence in the elevator was charged. We accidentally locked eyes once, but neither of us looked away. My heart hammered as if it would explode. The chemistry radiating through that cramped space felt like an electric current. Would it be indecent to admit that, suddenly, I felt aroused? Just one glance, but it turns me on. I breathed in his scent.
My legs felt weak. Every small movement of his facial muscles made my mind wander. Even the faint lines on his face were like art; the veins on his arms looked so strong. I thought about what Jamie said-how everyone’s voice shakes when talking about JP. Yes, he is devastatingly hot. The thought that God is unfair flashed through my mind again-a thought I’d had often since we parted.

“Next time we meet, I’ll bring your suit jacket and umbrella back to you,” I said, mostly because if I stayed silent, I felt like I might jump him. He nodded and pressed the button to open the doors as we reached the ground floor.

“After you.” We reached the company car. As I was about to step in, a question nagged at me.

“What was the reason I didn’t get the job at your company?”

“Because you don’t fit the organizational culture,” he answered simply, as if he knew I’d ask. I opened my mouth to protest, but he continued: “Plus, it isn’t your dream. Getting a job there would only keep you stuck in a safe zone. Your skills weren’t the problem, if that’s what you’re wondering.” I went quiet. He was right. If I got a job at such a prestigious company, I’d pour my soul into it for the sake of progress and eventually lose sight of my true dreams.

“And I fit the babysitter position?” He gave a small smile.

“You’re a perfect fit.” He knew I wouldn’t be a nanny forever. Perhaps he was secretly rooting for me to chase my dreams. I looked away and spoke quickly.

“See you then, boss.”

“Yes. See you.” The car dropped me off at my home-our family pharmacy. My mom was ecstatic when she heard I got the job. I realized I’d eventually have to explain it wasn’t a corporate job and that I’d be moving out, but I waited for a quieter time. I ran into my brother, Jet. He was happy for me too. I followed him into his room.

“Jet… is CPR hard?”

“CPR? Why do you want to know?”

“For the new job. They want me to know first aid. Can you teach me?”

“You have to practice, but anyone can do it. It’s different for adults, kids, and infants though. Take the course first, then I’ll help you train.” After a loud dinner where my dad pressured my sister to study Pharmacy to take over the shop, a huge argument broke out. Jean wants to be a dancer; dad thinks she’s being flighty and lazy. Jean ran upstairs crying. It was a harsh dose of reality, but perhaps a necessary wake-up call. Once things calmed down, I brought Mom and Dad into the bedroom to tell them the truth.

“I got the job, but it’s a nanny position for a Western child. The salary is 80, 000 baht.”

“What!?” Dad jumped up.

“Are you crazy? You have talent! You’ll lose your skills. What happens when the kid grows up? You’ll be unemployed and left behind by the new generation!”

“I already signed the contract.””… ”

“And… the employer, Khun Lilac… he is P’Jane.” The room went dead silent.

“Lilac is his business codename. I only found out at the interview. If it were anyone else, I wouldn’t do it. But because it’s P’Jane, I agreed.” Dad and Mom locked eyes. They haven’t forgotten who helped our family get on its feet. P’Jane was the one who gave Dad the money to start this pharmacy.

“That ‘P’Jane’… our family owes him a lot,” Mom whispered .

“I won’t do it forever,” I added.

“But I don’t want to lose the chance to see him again. I think you understand.”

I drove to the location P’Jane sent-the Saguana Mansion. It was a historic estate, over 126 years old. P’Jane, being the direct heir, had inherited it. A maid led me through the grand, ancient house. I heard the faint sound of a piano-Für Elise. I found P’Jane at a grand piano, dressed in a black shirt, still in mourning for his mother.

He stopped playing when he saw me.

“I’ll give you a tour.

It’s big; you might get lost.” He explained the house’s history-how it’s under the Fine Arts Department’s care because of its craftsmanship. He mentioned a “curse” that said only direct heirs could live there, though he dismissed it as “stupid.” He joked about tearing it down if it caused too much trouble, which made me shiver-he really is a businessman, willing to cut out anything that causes a problem.

Has our love been ‘cut out’ like that too? I wondered.

“You can go anywhere in this house,” he noted, “except for that room.” He pointed to an ornate black and gold door in the distance.” That room is forbidden. Never enter it.” Then he showed me my room. It was huge, but decorated exactly in the warm, MUJI-style I love. Brick-orange wallpaper, mustard yellow bedding, and a Moon lamp.

“I had someone decorate it the other day. You still like warm tones, right?”

“Yes… I still love mustard yellow. Just the same.” I was so happy l didn’t see his expression. P’Jane sat down in a chair. He looked like a “Dark Reaper” in this bright, warm room.

“Jamie finishes school at 3: 30. You need to pick him up. You can take a taxi.”

“I ‘Il drive. I ‘Il pick him up myself.” He stared at me for a moment.

“Fine. You also drop him off at 8: 00 AM. But your most important job isn’t childcare-Jamie can handle himself. I want you to teach him Thai. Reading, writing, and speaking for at least 90 minutes a day.”

“I’m starting from the alphabet, then?”

“Yes. Jamie is smart and cautious, but he does things slowly because he thinks a lot. He’s a gifted athlete-was a soccer captain in New York-and he’s starting piano and horseback riding lessons next week.”

“Does he have to study Thai every single day? Even on lesson days?”

“Every day. He needs to learn as fast as possible.” I bit my lip. I didn’t agree with the pressure, but I’d negotiate the schedule later. It felt more like he hired a private tutor than a nanny. I shut my iPad and looked at his sharp face. There it was again-that electric spark. I swallowed hard, trying not to show how much I craved him. He isn’t just handsome; he’s “fire-hot.” If you don’t know what that means, look at Jane Patrick Palakorn. At thirty-two, his sex appeal is off the charts. He didn’t get up. He just stared at me with the same intensity he had when we first met years ago. But I’m not twenty anymore. I didn’t look away.

“It’s only 2: 00 PM,” I began.

“Jamie doesn’t finish for another hour and a half.”

“Mm-hmm,” he hummed in his throat.

“So… what should the two of us do until then, P’?”