Deep in the Act: Chapter 29

“Thanks, sis in law!” Xiao Wang and several female staff members held their bottles of Evian mineral water, eagerly thanking Feng Yun Ting.

“What sis in law,” Feng Yun Ting waved her hand bashfully. On her first day visiting the set, she had bought water and snacks for everyone in the crew, including the drivers and assistants. “We haven’t gone public yet. It’s a secret relationship.”

“Teacher Zhen already brought you to the set. That’s half public already,” the girls crowded around her, eagerly trying to get close. “Which celebrity doesn’t have a boyfriend or girlfriend? None of that is a problem nowadays.”

They chattered away. Zhen Xin sat to the side, irritably reading his script. She had arrived so suddenly, so suddenly that when he shook off Zhang Zhun’s hand, his heart had stopped beating. She had clearly seen it, but pretended she hadn’t. She showered, changed clothes, climbed into bed, and even held up strawberry and mint flavored glow in the dark condoms asking which one he wanted to use.

Zhen Xin had a headache. Just as they said, which male celebrity doesn’t have a girlfriend? None of that was a problem nowadays. What excuse could he give her? That he had recently fallen for a man?

“Honey,” Feng Yun Ting finished her socializing and came over, linking her arm through his. “They’re so annoying. They just won’t stop talking.”

“Do you really want to go public with me?” Zhen Xin asked lazily.

“Is that not okay?” She puffed out her cheeks, looking at him straight on like some small animal. She was dressed very prettily today. Her long hair had been carefully blow dried, smoothly cascading down to her waist. Her big eyes had light makeup on, with only her lips heavily done up, glossy and pouting like jelly. The lemon yellow dress suited her skin tone perfectly. Big breasts, slim waist, round hips. No man could bear to refuse her.

Zhen Xin couldn’t bring himself to say no. Just as he didn’t know how to respond, the door opened. Xiao Deng came in playing with his phone, hooking the door with his foot. Zhen Xin’s eyes uncontrollably fixed on the doorway, like before a grand performance begins, knowing that what you want to see is about to come on stage. How could you bear to look away?

Sure enough, before long, Zhang Zhun appeared. His makeup was already done. Slicked back hair, silver earrings, a very refined suit. The waist area had clearly been specially altered, with perfect curves. He wore a silk ascot tie, black and white floral, diffusing a decadent perfume scent.

Zhen Xin’s scalp tingled with desire. Feng Yun Ting suddenly said, “He’s so handsome. Last night he looked so plain.”

Zhen Xin must have been so lovestruck he was absentminded, foolishly saying, “Actually he looks better in his normal everyday way. Very comfortable. This is too done up.”

“Oh,” Feng Yun Ting dragged out the end of her word. “So you don’t like him in the drama, you like him outside the drama.”

There was meaning behind her words. Zhen Xin realized he had lost himself. He wanted to say something to explain, but she was fiddling with her newly done candy colored nails, as if it had been a casual remark.

Zhang Zhun had actually seen Zhen Xin the moment he entered. He was just as dazzling as when they parted last night, almost burning him. And his girlfriend, like a modern pin up girl stepped out of a childhood picture, they were a perfect match made in heaven.

Chen Zheng Sen walked over with a frown, his chubby palm lifting Zhang Zhun’s chin. “Why are your eyes swollen? And there are red veins. What were you thinking about at night that you didn’t sleep!”

“Stayed up too late reading the script,” Zhang Zhun lied. “First treatment scene today. Afraid of messing it up.”

“Zhou Zheng,” Chen Zheng Sen looked very unhappy. “Where’s that Japanese eye drop for red veins!”

Zhou Zheng had someone go look for it. When found, it was given to Xiao Deng, who reminded him, “Hurry up. We need to shoot two scenes today. Don’t fall behind.”

Only Zhen Xin and Feng Yun Ting had chairs beside them. Zhang Zhun awkwardly sat down next to them, forcing a smile as he greeted them. He seemed somewhat uneasy, unable to quite lift his head. Feng Yun Ting was very warm, reaching across Zhen Xin to extend her hand to him. “Teacher Zhang, last night was too rushed. We didn’t get to properly meet. When filming wraps, I’ll treat you to dinner.”

Zhang Zhun was surprised by her attitude. She had clearly seen it, yet seemed completely unbothered, completely different from Xie Dan Yi. He lightly returned her handshake. That hand was soft and limp, making one reluctant to hurt it.

Xiao Deng unscrewed the eye drops, holding Zhang Zhun’s cheek. “Bro, tilt your head back. Don’t be scared.”

Zhen Xin stared at Xiao Deng’s hand holding Zhang Zhun’s cheek. He was just holding it, but Zhen Xin was jealous to the point of madness, his words dripping with sourness. “Eye drops. What’s scary about that.”

Xiao Deng didn’t catch the jealousy in his words. He smiled and asked Zhang Zhun, “Bro, I’m going to do it,” then turned his head, speaking intimately to Zhen Xin, “He’s especially scared of eye drops!”

Zhang Zhun’s face clearly reddened. He was indeed a bit nervous, his fingers pinching the seam of his pants. “Did you drop them yet? Hurry up and drop them!”

Zhen Xin never knew he was scared of eye drops. He hadn’t had the chance to learn these harmless little details. He couldn’t tell if it was jealousy or longing. Like observing a flower about to bloom, he stared straight at the two of them. The first drop fell. Zhang Zhun trembled slightly. From deep in his throat, he reflexively let out an “ah.” The sound was so small, so small that he himself couldn’t hear it. But Zhen Xin heard it, magnified a hundredfold, a thousandfold, pounding against his heart.

“He’s so cute,” Feng Yun Ting held his hand, interlacing their fingers. “I’ve never seen a guy scared of eye drops.”

The things Zhen Xin wanted to say, she said them all, in a playful, coquettish tone. Zhen Xin suddenly found her quite charming, wanting to vigorously rub her pink cheeks.

“Bro, don’t be nervous. It’s all coming out!” Xiao Deng scrambled to wipe Zhang Zhun’s face, his fingers wet with eye drops dripping through the gaps. Zhen Xin really wanted to stand up and say “Let me do it,” but he was held by Feng Yun Ting, held until he was restless and agitated.

“That’s enough. Just like that.” Zhang Zhun pushed Xiao Deng away, eyes closed, mouth slightly open. The crisscrossing lines on his cheeks looked like tear tracks. Zhen Xin privately imagined that as what he looked like after they parted last night.

Looking around, there were so many people in the room. Director, production assistants, lighting, camera crew. Dozens of pairs of eyes. Yet Zhen Xin couldn’t help wanting to cross the line. He first pulled out his phone, leaning his body toward Zhang Zhun, his long legs naturally stretching over, pressing against Zhang Zhun’s leg. Zhang Zhun felt it and quietly pulled his leg back. At that moment, Zhen Xin put his phone into his pants pocket, and slipped that amorous hand into the corner formed by their two thighs. Zhang Zhun’s hand was right there, resting unconsciously on the edge of the chair.

Pinky pressed against pinky. Zhang Zhun was startled. His face involuntarily turned toward Zhen Xin. Zhen Xin looked at his surprised expression with insatiable desire, his pinky slowly, erotically rubbing against Zhang Zhun’s pinky.

It was just a pinky. But Zhang Zhun felt his whole body shudder. His eyes stung with pain, unable to open. In the darkness, he didn’t know if others could see. That forbidden, adulterous pleasure made his head spin. Anxiously, yet unwilling to withdraw his finger.

“Oh my, holding hands so tightly,” Chen Zheng Sen suddenly spoke from nearby. Zhang Zhun was terrified stiff, frozen in place, listening as he continued, “Secretly got a girlfriend, and hid it from me!”

Zhen Xin made no sound. Feng Yun Ting said in a cutesy voice, “Oh, Brother Chen, I was the one who didn’t let him say. You can’t blame him!”

Zhang Zhun blinked, enduring the pain to open his eyes. In a hazy blur he saw Chen Zheng Sen’s face. Following his teasing gaze, it landed on Zhen Xin and Feng Yun Ting’s tightly clasped hands. In an instant, his heart seemed to empty. No resentment, no pain. All sensation was lost. Silently, he curled his pinky, escaping from Zhen Xin’s hand.

“All departments ready,” Zhou Zheng clapped his hands in the center of the room. “Today is the first treatment scene. Everyone put your hearts into it. Teacher Zhen, Teacher Zhang, let’s first run through the scene.”

Zhen Xin and Zhang Zhun stood up one after another, walking to the filming area. Two chairs arranged at a sixty degree angle. Zhen Xin sat down on one of them. “Please sit,” he said to Zhang Zhun. “Today let’s try the physical contact exercise we talked about last time.”

Zhang Zhun stood facing him, taking a deep breath. He kept telling himself, this is acting, this is acting. His two trembling hands touched his suit buttons. Zhen Xin didn’t do anything, but his gaze, obsessive with a hint of teasing, burned Zhang Zhun’s face red. He turned his wrist, buttons coming undone one after another, revealing a thin shirt and a tightly cinched belt.

“Slower,” Chen Zheng Sen sat with his legs crossed, observing them from very close by. “Zhang Zhun, be more seductive.”

Zhen Xin swallowed, his two hands constantly changing their clasped angle. Zhang Zhun used a self sacrificing expression to slowly take off his suit, draping it over the back of the chair with a backward motion. The twisting of his arm pulled at the muscles of his waist. Seen through the tightly wrapped shirt, it was very sexy. Then he went to undo his tie. With one hand, a light tug at the knot, and the silk tie hung loose, spreading across his chest.

“I practiced what you told me,” he pressed his lips together. That reserved manner was truly full of charm. “Is this okay?”

Zhen Xin watched him excitedly, not speaking for a long time. It was like an underground game that only the two of them knew about. Zhang Zhun trembled with shame, and asked in a low voice again, “Is this okay?”

“Hold on,” Chen Zheng Sen shook the script in his hand, as if not knowing how to say it. After a while he spoke, “Teacher Zhen, you’re coming on too strong. Pull it back. At this point, Fang Chi’s feelings toward Gao Zhun… haven’t reached that stage yet.”

Which stage, he didn’t say it outright. Everyone present understood. Zhen Xin was being too emotional. Feng Yun Ting seized the moment to walk up, handing water to Zhen Xin, using a cat patterned handkerchief to wipe his sweat. “Honey, do you want to rest a bit?” Almost simultaneously, she glanced at Zhang Zhun. With just one glance, Zhang Zhun saw resentment in the corner of her eye.

“Let’s not waste time,” Chen Zheng Sen was very bothered by Feng Yun Ting inserting herself between the two of them, stamping his foot. “Continue.”

Zhen Xin ran his hand through his hair, straightened his prop glasses, and stared at Zhang Zhun through lenses wiped spotlessly clean. “When you practiced these exercises at home, what were you thinking about?”

Zhang Zhun felt sad being stared at by him. “Thinking of you,” this was a line, yet also seemed like a true feeling from his heart, making him involuntarily grip his tie tight. “I imagined you on the other side…”

Chen Zheng Sen interrupted him, “Skip this part. Go straight to ‘is this distance acceptable to you.'”

So Zhen Xin stood up, fixedly looking at Zhang Zhun, cautiously taking a step toward him. Zhang Zhun’s whole body was tense, with a tendency to step back, but he held it in, quietly waiting for him to walk over.

“Is this distance acceptable to you?” Almost pressed against his face, Zhen Xin asked.

Zhang Zhun immediately lowered his head. His heart stung with pain, yet he pretended to speak with a laughing tone, “This… is very strange.”

It was the kind of laugh you make when a good friend tickles you. Zhen Xin could tell he was forcing himself to act. “I might come across as rather aggressive.” Following the script notes, he took another step forward, like intimacy, yet also like pressure. Zhang Zhun immediately stepped back. The psychological fragility needed no acting at all.

For a moment, Zhen Xin was dazed, unable to tell if this was reality or acting. Was it the two of them advancing and retreating, testing each other, or was it Gao Zhun and Fang Chi? “Why are you hiding,” he asked somewhat sorrowfully. That wasn’t Fang Chi’s voice. It was his own. “That night we were already holding each other. Why are you afraid now?”

What he said seemed to be about last night. Zhang Zhun’s brows twitched. He wanted to answer, but couldn’t make a sound. The lines got stuck in his throat several times. Zhen Xin didn’t give him time, urgently taking another step forward. Zhang Zhun was pressed against the wall, his back against hard plaster. Zhen Xin was two centimeters in front of him, his exhaled breath constantly spraying against his forehead.

Zhang Zhun closed his eyes. Others couldn’t see, but Zhen Xin saw clearly. He had an expression on the verge of tears. The world seemed to have shrunk to just the two of them, and those trembling eyelashes. The script said Fang Chi should step back a bit, but Zhen Xin didn’t want to step back. Pressed against Zhang Zhun’s ear, he murmured tenderly, “Next let’s try touching.”

He waved his slender fingers before Zhang Zhun’s eyes. “Can I touch your face?”

Zhang Zhun’s eyes wandered between him and those fingers, watching as the palm slowly covered his forehead. He was so nervous he was sweating. Fingers slid down the bridge of his nose, landing on the philtrum, passing over his lip. Zhen Xin’s mind was buzzing. He had long forgotten the sequence in the script, almost randomly caressing Zhang Zhun’s body.

Something was wrong. The on site staff could all feel it, exchanging glances and looking at each other in bewilderment. Zhang Zhun pleaded in panic, “Can… can we stop!”

“Just endure a bit longer…” Zhen Xin’s tone didn’t match the plot, perfunctory, like an impatient pervert.

“Don’t… don’t…” Zhang Zhun began to push against him. Zhen Xin should have acted surprised, then lightly, symbolically tussled with him. But he didn’t. Instead he gripped Zhang Zhun’s hands with all his strength, as if wanting to possess him, flipping him around and pressing him against the wall from behind, pinning him down hard. Zhang Zhun’s shoulders and back trembled again and again. Tears streamed down his cheekbones. Zhen Xin gripped his chin, forcing him to turn his face, about to press his mouth against his…

“Cut cut cut!” Chen Zheng Sen was so angry he threw his script. “Zhen Xin, that’s wrong! Completely wrong!”

Zhen Xin knew he had gone too far. He sheepishly let go of Gao Zhun, yet put on a righteous face. “I think handling it this way is more intense, more dramatically conflicted.”

Chen Zheng Sen gave him face, didn’t argue with him. “Zhang Zhun, explain the scene to him,” he added, intentionally for Zhen Xin to hear, “At this rate, even dialogue scenes will need a closed set!”

Was he asking Zhang Zhun to explain the scene? No. Zhen Xin understood. Head lowered, he wanted to put his arm around Zhang Zhun’s shoulder, but his hand was grabbed. It was Xiao Deng, glaring with a pair of young, impulsive eyes, shoving him hard. Feng Yun Ting hurried over, grabbing Zhen Xin’s arm, thinking they were about to fight. The four of them stood in a tense standoff, undercurrents surging, no one speaking first.

In the end it was Zhang Zhun, using his sleeve to wipe his face, pushing Xiao Deng aside and walking out. He pulled Zhen Xin’s sleeve from Feng Yun Ting’s hand, as if giving her an explanation. “Explaining the scene.” Then he pushed Zhen Xin into the restroom.

A click. The door closed and locked.