Deep in the Act: Chapter 33

Zhen Xin and Zhang Zhun walked back to the hotel, choosing a road with not many people. When there were people, they walked shoulder to shoulder. When there was no one, they hooked hands. When they were almost at the hotel, Zhen Xin put on his hat. They passed through the small parking lot in front of the sailor bar, entered through the hotel’s back door, and as soon as they went in, they were blocked by cameras and microphones of every size.

Those people immediately recognized him, crowding around him from all sides, shouting “Zhen Xin,” “Zhen Xin” at the top of their lungs!

The two of them were dumbfounded, standing there blankly, listening to entertainment reporters from every outlet scrambling to ask, “Teacher Zhen! You’ve been dating Miss Feng Yun Ting for half a year. Why did you choose to go public at this time!”

“Teacher Zhen! We interviewed Miss Feng. She said you currently have no marriage plans. Is that true!”

“Please talk about how you’re feeling right now, Teacher Zhen!”

The flashbulbs lit up like they were permanently on. Zhen Xin, experienced, lowered his head to shield his eyes. Zhang Zhun was completely unprepared. His eyes were flashed until they stung, tears involuntarily streaming down. Most of the entertainment reporters didn’t recognize him. Pulling and shoving, pushing and squeezing, they crowded toward Zhen Xin. Zhang Zhun was like an irrelevant bystander, pushed farther and farther away by these people.

In the chaos, he heard his own phone ring. He answered completely mechanically. It was Zhou Zheng, shouting urgently as if someone had stepped on his tail. “Teacher Zhang, are you with Zhen Xin!”

Zhang Zhun was about to say “together,” but looking around, he couldn’t find Zhen Xin anymore. Clearly in the same space, yet it was like they were in two different worlds. “No…” He had no choice but to surrender to this helplessness. “Not together…”

Zhou Zheng said something else, and the call disconnected. Zhen Xin was swept into the hotel’s self operated coffee shop, probably giving an interview. Zhang Zhun was left alone, blankly staring at the blinking elevator buttons for a moment, then lightly pressing one.

Entering the room, he habitually turned on the TV. What appeared on the screen was Feng Yun Ting’s face. She wasn’t dressed up much, still in the same clothes from the hot pot restaurant. She must have driven back first and been caught for an interview. She looked very evasive. The reporter pressed her, “Miss Feng, why are you at this hotel! There are rumors that you and Teacher Zhen Xin have a secret relationship. Did you come to visit him on set!”

Zhang Zhun started searching for the remote. As soon as he found it, he hysterically changed channels. He switched through several channels and they were all her. He watched as she went from evasive at first to half pushing, half telling her story, and finally said with a red face and sweet smile, “We haven’t decided to go public yet. We don’t want to put pressure on each other… Yes, our relationship is very stable now… Yes…”

Zhang Zhun watched her like he was watching a play, coldly shaking his head several times. What she said wasn’t the truth, yet the truth he couldn’t speak. Just then an online media reporter asked, “If I’m not mistaken, Teacher Zhen Xin is currently filming a gay movie. It’s said to be very bold. Miss Feng, do you mind? Or did you come to ‘supervise’ this time?”

The atmosphere relaxed into easy laughter. Feng Yun Ting answered very obediently, “Of course not. It’s just filming. I have situations like that too. We understand each other very well. And like you just said, it’s a gay movie. If it weren’t a gay movie, then I would need to ‘supervise.'”

Her answer was very pleasing, and the atmosphere immediately livened up. An entertainment reporter asked again, “Have you met the actor playing opposite Teacher Zhen? Would you get jealous?”

Feng Yun Ting burst out laughing. “Teacher Zhang Zhun and I get along very well. We were just eating hot pot together,” she shyly covered her mouth, making a joke as she spoke. “I’m not worried about him and Zhen Xin at all!”

Zhang Zhun’s chest felt so tight it hurt. After the pain passed, it went numb. He stared at the TV with some indifference. The interview segment ended. Next was a review of Feng Yun Ting’s career path, saying how hardworking and talented she was, a rare new generation actress without any scandals. The doorbell rang. Zhang Zhun coldly glanced at that door, not responding. The person outside called, “Bro, it’s me.”

It was Xiao Deng. He opened the door and let him in. The big guy carried a bag of snacks in his left hand and a USB drive in his right. As soon as he entered, he glanced at the TV. “Bro, what program is this? Not good to watch.” He plugged in the USB drive. “Your favorite ‘A Chinese Odyssey.’ We haven’t watched it this year yet.”

Holding the snacks, he climbed onto the bed, propped up a pillow for Zhang Zhun, and patted it. Zhang Zhun lay down very reluctantly. On the TV were the flirtatious, passionate brows and eyes of the Spring Thirty Lady, and Stephen Chow’s sour line, “The long night stretches on, I have no heart for sleep.” Xiao Deng chewed his chips and laughed foolishly, laughing while sizing Zhang Zhun up. The bright white light from the TV fell on Zhang Zhun’s face. His cheekbones were wet with tears. Noticing Xiao Deng staring at him, he awkwardly wiped them with his arm.

“Bro, don’t be like this…” Xiao Deng went up to pull his hand.

“No…” Zhang Zhun shook his head and pushed him away. “I just thought of what happens later with Zixia and the Monkey King.”

“Bro…” Xiao Deng wanted to comfort him more. Zhang Zhun was very afraid he would make some confused things clear. He pretended to be impatient. “Alright alright, I don’t want to watch anymore. You go.”

Xiao Deng suddenly got angry, pulling out his phone to make a call. Zhang Zhun stopped him. “What are you doing!”

He didn’t know what he was doing, what he could do. He just felt sorry for his brother. What he felt sorry about, he couldn’t say clearly. Probably it was a kind of venting at the end of helplessness. He stubbornly pulled out the USB drive. Before leaving, he threw down one line. “Bro, wake up!”

He couldn’t wake up. Zhang Zhun dejectedly hugged his head. The snow static on the TV made cold “buzzing” sounds. He warned himself not to be stubbornly deluded anymore, yet he picked up the remote as if possessed. The screen flickered, and Zhen Xin’s face appeared. Unruly curls, melancholy eyes. He looked so handsome on camera, so handsome he didn’t seem like the person he knew. That was the dream of countless people, an expensive consumer product, not belonging to him.

“I don’t like the media paying too much attention to my private life.” Zhen Xin’s face was expressionless. That look easily made people mistake it for arrogance. Actually he was just exhausted.

“Since you’ve gone public with your relationship with Miss Feng, why did you say your feelings are uncertain?”

Zhen Xin didn’t answer. Compared to Feng Yun Ting, interviewing him was clearly much more difficult. The entertainment reporters pressed on with hardened scalps, “You just admitted you were passionately in love. Could it be that the person isn’t Miss Feng?”

Zhang Zhun’s throat went dry with tension. He couldn’t believe Zhen Xin had really said that. In that instant, he even wanted to text him to tell him to stop. But glancing at the upper right corner of the screen, the white letters said “Rerun.” Zhang Zhun felt absurd at himself for that instant. He was already standing at the edge of reason. One step and he would be shattered to pieces. But Zhen Xin behind the screen looked completely calm. “Interviewing me is your business. My love is my own business. I have no obligation to announce everything to the world.”

A reporter standing slightly farther in the crowd asked sharply, “Does this mean you’re saying you’re an irresponsible person in relationships?”

Zhen Xin finally showed a trace of expression. Fierce, challenging, glaring at that guy. “Who am I responsible to? I’m only responsible to the person I love!”

“Who is the person you love?” Zhang Zhun blurted out. As soon as the words left his mouth, he scared himself. He quickly covered his mouth with his hand. Almost simultaneously, the rerun signal cut off. After two unremarkable men’s clothing commercials came the top of the hour news. Once again, he hysterically pressed the remote, just wanting to see Zhen Xin’s full interview. But this time every channel had the news anchor’s stiff face.

Early in the morning, Zhang Zhun and Xiao Deng went upstairs to eat together. It was supposed to be a morning shoot, but when they got to the restaurant, the production assistant notified them that all filming for today was canceled. Sitting all around were many entertainment reporters who had been lying in wait. Zhang Zhun thought it was to avoid them. Xiao Deng went to ask around and found out that Zhen Xin had an upset stomach, acute gastroenteritis. He had been getting IV drips in his room since midnight last night.

It was those few bites of glass noodles from the spicy hot pot. Zhang Zhun immediately thought of it. He had caused him to suffer this “gut wrenching” pain. Xiao Deng didn’t know the inside story, saying sarcastically, “Is that really necessary? Big movie king, scared stiff just from exposing a secret relationship.”

Zhang Zhun glared at him fiercely. Xiao Deng felt a bit wronged, but still shut his mouth. At the neighboring table, several entertainment reporters kept looking their way, whispering now and then, as if recognizing him as Zhen Xin’s scene partner. When they were almost done eating, they tiptoed over, greeting with a smile, “Teacher Zhang Zhun, right? We’re from Sun Entertainment.”

Zhang Zhun was very cautious. “Hello.” He nodded and wanted to leave. Those people clearly wanted to keep chatting. “What do you think of Zhen Xin’s secret relationship?”

What followed was Xiao Deng’s job. He stood in front of Zhang Zhun with his tall frame. “Other people’s secret relationships, what does that have to do with us sometimes,” he hid Zhang Zhun behind him, half embracing him. “Bro, you go first.”

“I… I’m going to the thirty eighth floor,” Zhang Zhun’s voice was soft, brushing past his ear. Xiao Deng turned his head. His brother’s expression was somewhat pitiful, like a half cut withered branch taken from a vase, with a rugged bearing. “I’m going to see him.”

Those entertainment reporters pushed against Xiao Deng, but couldn’t move him at all. “Why bother, we’re just asking one question,” they pursued relentlessly. “Teacher Zhang, you’re with Zhen Xin every day. Does he have any other women? Give us a hint!”

This was stabbing a knife into Zhang Zhun’s heart. Xiao Deng pointed down at them from above. “Say one more word, believe it or not I’ll beat you half to death!”

Zhang Zhun went up to the thirty eighth floor. When he got off the elevator, several people carrying equipment were smoking. People were coming and going in the hallway ahead. He lowered his head and slowly walked toward Zhen Xin’s room. Reporters were leaning against the walls on both sides. Some were sitting on the carpet. They all looked him over, watching him press Zhen Xin’s doorbell, stirring with sensitive curiosity. Zhang Zhun heard them whispering, “Who is that… looks a bit familiar…”

The door opened. Inside was Feng Yun Ting. Seeing him, she was taken aback, then smiled warmly. “Teacher Zhang, come in quickly!”

Zhang Zhun knew it would be her opening Zhen Xin’s door, but he was still awkward. He stepped inside, hearing her say lightly, “You really dared to come.”

He pretended not to hear. “How is he?”

Feng Yun Ting looked at him blandly. She was still in yesterday’s clothes, clearly hadn’t slept much. Her made up face was still tired. “The fever’s down. Nothing serious.”

Zhang Zhun walked toward the bed. He had been to this room many times. He knew exactly where the tables and chairs were. But right now, colorful dresses were draped over the chairs. Expensive handbags and silk scarves were on the table. He turned his head. Zhen Xin was lying on the big bed, an IV drip in his left hand. A coat rack had been temporarily dragged over to hang the saline bag. He was awake and had already seen him, his eyes turning slowly.

“Came empty handed?” he asked in a hoarse voice, with a comical kind of fragility.

Zhang Zhun found it amusing. “Do I need to buy you some fruit too?”

Zhen Xin lightly raised his right hand, pointing to the long decorative table by the door. It was densely covered with fruit and flowers. “Came late and didn’t bring anything.”

A chair was placed by the bed. It looked like many people had indeed come by. Zhang Zhun glanced at Feng Yun Ting before sitting down stiffly. “Coming is giving you face.”

Zhen Xin laughed, laugh lines deepening on both cheeks. It was clear he was truly delighted. He looked at Zhang Zhun with lingering eyes, examining him carefully, and suddenly blurted out, “I just wanted to see you.”

Every hair on Zhang Zhun’s body stood up. It was like being stripped naked. Shame, panic, and a bit of immoral secret delight. Feng Yun Ting let out a sigh, her hands folded across her chest, turning her back to walk toward the window. She was enduring it. Her two narrow shoulders trembled continuously.

“It’s good that you’re okay…” Zhang Zhun wanted to stand up. Zhen Xin could tell he was about to leave. He stretched out a sweaty hand from under the thick covers, palm up, slanting over the side of the bed. Zhang Zhun was as if shocked by electricity, anxiously looking toward Feng Yun Ting. She was tidying up those sparkling perfume bottles, with a woman’s particular neatness and delicacy.

“Don’t catch a cold.” Zhang Zhun pushed his hand back under the covers. As his two trembling hands just made contact, Zhen Xin gripped him, tight, as if about to crush him. “This way it’s not cold,” he said. “You Sichuan people can really eat spicy. Your personality is spicy too…”

Spicy. That was Zhang Zhun’s entire feeling at this moment. Spicy with guilt, spicy with sweating, spicy with hot air breathing from his nostrils. Zhen Chi rubbed his hand like he was reading his fortune, inch by inch, section by section, rubbing until his heart ached.

“Tell me about your dream?” he suddenly said. This was abrupt, but Zhang Zhun immediately understood. “I don’t dare…”

“What are you afraid of?” Zhen Xin traced up his forearm along his hand.

“I don’t know. I’m afraid of remembering that thing, but it’s always there…” Zhang Zhun’s expression changed, as if a hard shell had been peeled away, tender enough to drip water. Feng Yun Ting watched the two of them in astonishment. They had an atmosphere that needles couldn’t pierce, water couldn’t splash through.

“I want to know…” Zhen Xin struggled to sit up from the bed, pulling Zhang Zhun toward his chest by the arm. “It’s fine, I’m here,” he embraced him forgetfully, with a burning hot chest. “See, you can accept being touched by someone.”

Zhang Zhun boiled over, sighing, with a voice full of desire. “…Only you.”

Feng Yun Ting knew they were running lines. Those ambiguous glances, those explicit lines, this was all part of the play. But she couldn’t take it. She couldn’t take Zhen Xin obsessively caressing that man in his arms, asking in a hoarse voice, “I can hear your heartbeat. Can you hear mine?”

“Enough!” She swept all the carefully arranged perfume bottles to the floor, finally exploding.

Zhen Xin seemed to have been waiting for this moment. He let go of Zhang Zhun, casting a calm gaze toward her. Just one brief exchange of looks, and Feng Yun Ting understood. She calmed down. “Honey, you two continue running lines. I’ll go get you a glass of milk.” She put on her coat. Her small skirt swayed lightly. She opened the door, turning back with a sweet smile. “Take your time chatting.”