Five years later.

He Ning was accompanying an employer to the hospital for an abortion, holding the medical examination report in his hands.

Sitting next to him was a girl in her early twenties. Her nail polish was chipped and peeling, and her ears were pierced multiple times.

He Ning had been registered on an medical accompaniment platform for two years. He occasionally took orders during his days off, accompanying people to see doctors, pick up medication, or, like today, coming along for a surgery.

Over the years, he had accompanied an elderly person living alone who used crutches and chatted the entire way about how successful their children were abroad, being too busy to ever return. He had accompanied a female intern running a high fever, who cried while modifying a presentation slide deck in the IV room before finally falling into a heavy sleep against his shoulder. He had also accompanied an aunt who had just finished chemotherapy and insisted on stuffing a bag of her homemade pickled vegetables into his hands, saying it tasted better than anything bought outside.

He Ning had learned to hand over tissues at the right moment, to throw out a harmless question when the silence lasted too long, and to pretend to look at his phone when the other person hesitated to speak.

Sometimes during the accompaniment, the other person would suddenly burst into tears. He Ning would just sit quietly, waiting for the wave of emotion to pass.

Going to the hospital alone is a very lonely and cruel thing. Whenever He Ning saw them, he would think of his own past.

The girl was extremely nervous before entering the operating room, so He Ning went to pour her a cup of hot water and comforted her, saying it would be over very soon.

Clutching the hot water, the girl’s eye makeup was a bit smudged, forming two gray streaks under her eyes. She asked repeatedly in a somewhat neurotic manner, “You won’t leave, right?”

“Of course not. This is my job. I will wait for you outside, otherwise you can give me a negative review.”

He Ning had a lot of positive reviews on his account.

A hint of a smile finally appeared on the girl’s pale face. “The reviews on the platform all said you are exceptionally reliable. I scrolled for a long time before choosing you.”

Her fingers gripping the medical record folder relaxed slightly.

He Ning took her shoulder bag and watched the nurse guide her into the operating room.

As he turned around, out of the corner of his eye, he caught a figure at the end of the hallway. He was instinctively about to sit on a chair, but his movement suddenly froze mid air, as if he were pinned to the spot by some invisible force.

He lifted his head, and his first reaction was that he was hallucinating.

The overhead lights in the hallway were blindingly white, but upon taking a second look, that face was unmistakably Wen Junhe.

The collar of his black trench coat was crisp, making his shoulder line look even sharper. His face, which looked more mature than it did five years ago, showed no emotion whatsoever.

Wen Junhe stood there like a painting forcibly inserted into reality, completely out of place with the passing pedestrians and the caregivers pushing wheelchairs around him.

He just stood there with his hands shoved in his trench coat pockets, his shoulders slightly tensed.

Who would have thought that after several years since the breakup, his reunion with Wen Junhe would take place in front of an operating room.

And in front of an abortion operating room at that.

The very first time he saw Wen Junhe, he thought he was overwhelmingly handsome.

So handsome that he dreamed of having him.

Wen Junhe had broad features, exquisite eyes, a straight nose, and somewhat thin lips. No matter how many times He Ning had kissed them in the past, they always felt a bit cool.

The fluorescent lights in the hallway made one’s eyes feel dry, and the smell of disinfectant stagnated in the air like an invisible film.

Neither of them said a word.

Suddenly, the sound of high heels broke the dead silence.

“Junhe?” A woman wearing a beige long dress walked over from the corner, naturally calling out Wen Junhe’s name. “Why did you run off here? The director is still waiting for you. Let’s go.”

She swept a glance at the lit sign of the operating room, then looked at He Ning, her eyes carrying a polite confusion.

Wen Junhe took a step back decisively, turned around, and walked away.

The woman followed by his side, whispering something, and Wen Junhe nodded slightly.

Wen Junhe’s back was upright and cold. The sound of his leather shoes striking the floor tiles was clear to the point of being piercing, step by step, until he completely disappeared around the corner.

He Ning stared blankly at the empty hallway. Watching them disappear, he realized that the back of his shirt was already drenched in sweat, his fingers unconsciously rubbing the crumpled payment receipt in his pocket.

It wasn’t until the nurse pushed the door open to come out that he suddenly snapped out of it. He saw the girl being supported as she walked out, her face as white as paper and her lips devoid of color.

The nurse stated the precautionary measures and prescribed the medication.

He Ning silently helped her sit down in the hospital lobby, called a car, and waited until the car arrived before half guiding and half supporting her out. The wind was very cold, and the girl’s fingertips were trembling in his palm.

On the way back with the girl, when the driver was halfway there, she suddenly broke down. Large tears crashed down, her voice hoarse beyond recognition. “Do you think I… lack self-respect?”

He Ning reached out to hand her a tissue, his tone calm. “No.”

He Ning delivered the girl to her doorstep. The light in the hallway had a faulty connection, flickering and straining the eyes. The girl leaned against the wall and slowly moved inside. He stood outside the door and said, “Take more care of yourself in the future.”

He had no right to judge anyone else’s life anyway. Speaking even half a word of his own past felt embarrassing. His own life was a complete mess, his view on love was a total disaster, and he was always disliked by others. Going downstairs, the cold wind gave him a headache. He Ning searched his entire body but couldn’t find a cigarette, instead pulling out a crumpled hospital receipt.

He Ning thought somewhat wildly that if he were a woman, he probably would have been gotten pregnant by Wen Junhe several times over by now. He never used condoms, and since Wen Junhe didn’t love him, he probably wouldn’t feel bad for his body either.

And since he despicably craved to be with Wen Junhe, he probably would have been willing to do anything.

He Ning bought the cheapest pack of cigarettes at the convenience store and sat on the steps nearby to smoke. The taste of nicotine rushed into his lungs, causing him to cough violently, and he threw the cigarette into the trash can.

Accompanying people to see doctors was a job he only did when he had weekend breaks. He used to run to the hospital constantly a few years ago, practically treating it as a second home. Registration, payment, picking up medicine—he knew every single step so well he could recite them from memory.

Those people sitting alone in the waiting area, their fingers turning white from gripping their medical record folders, their eyes staring blankly at the calling screen—he understood that kind of loneliness better than anyone.

He was currently working as an art designer at a tech company, working from nine to six. His university studies had been completed with great difficulty. He had taken a one year medical leave of absence, waiting until everyone who knew him had graduated before secretly returning to finish his final classes.

He always sat in the very last row of the classroom, rushing out with his head down the moment the dismissal bell rang, terrified that someone would see him and ask, “Why are you here?”

He didn’t go to take graduation photos. His degree certificate was picked up individually from the academic affairs office, feeling light inside the document envelope, like a fake certificate.

The company had been talking about an acquisition recently, leaving people anxious in the pantry, but He Ning found it irrelevant. It was all working for a living anyway. Changing bosses meant getting paid just the same, making no difference to him.

Before the Monday morning meeting, he swallowed half a piece of dry whole wheat bread and walked toward the conference room.

He heard that the newly transferred executive vice president was arriving today. Until the moment he pushed open the door, a familiar voice came from ahead. Wen Junhe was wearing a crisp suit, looking down and talking to the general assistant, his cufflinks reflecting a cold light under the illumination.

He marvelled at how small the world truly was.

The ex boyfriend he broke up with five years ago had now become his leader.

He was distracted throughout the entire meeting, his fingers unconsciously drawing meaningless lines on his notebook. Wen Junhe’s voice echoed in the conference room, low and calm.

After the meeting adjourned, Lin Ke bumped his shoulder. “This doesn’t look like you. You used to take meeting minutes so neatly, but today you didn’t even lift your head?”

He Ning closed his blank notebook and pulled the corners of his mouth. “I didn’t sleep well last night.”

His colleagues always joked that He Ning was like a primary school student, needing to write down every insignificant matter, even recording the WiFi password on a sticky note.

During meetings, he always kept his head down writing and drawing, neatly recording even the casual gossip others muttered. No one knew that after his surgery, his memory became like a leaking sieve. The name of a client he just met last week, or the parameters of a design draft he just modified yesterday, would be forgotten just like that.

So he invented his own system of memory.

He set over a dozen alarms on his phone: taking medicine in the morning, ordering lunch at noon, submitting drafts before off work, with sticky notes covering his headboard. His memos were densely packed with trivial matters like buying toothpaste after work or paying property fees.

When he was discharged from the hospital two years ago, the doctor said that this kind of memory damage might last a lifetime.

But it was truly strange that he simply could not forget matters regarding Wen Junhe. Seeing him again, his heart still ached.

In the past, he had Wen Junhe by his side, who would always remind him about exams, class schedules, and not to leave anything behind when going out. Now, he only had himself.

He Ning said, “There’s nothing to write down,” and prepared to leave the conference room, as the lowered voices of his colleagues’ discussions reached his ears.

They said Wen Junhe was headhunted at a massive expense, that he obtained his degree from a top tier academy abroad, and described what kind of astonishing terms the company offered him.

Wen Junhe became famous during a cross border merger and acquisition case three years ago. The methods Wen Junhe used to manage the operation were ruthless and experienced, leaving even a group of financial veterans stunned.

The colleagues in the pantry were still gossiping about Wen Junhe’s resume, talking about how he made a name for himself in the City of London.

He Ning still remembered that in an exclusive interview with a certain financial magazine, the reporter asked Wen Junhe about his ideal partner standards. Wen Junhe said he looked more for common topics, and some people said he was a sapiosexual.

That night, He Ning searched for the definition of “sapiosexual.” Staring at the encyclopedia entry, he thought about how failing classes in high school was a regular occurrence for him, how he had failed courses in university, and how his graduation thesis barely passed. He probably couldn’t even reach the threshold of Wen Junhe’s partner criteria in this lifetime.

No wonder Wen Junhe couldn’t get hard for him.

He Ning watched Wen Junhe move further and further away from him, becoming more and more unreachable, as if only he himself was left behind on the spot.

He Ning’s life hit a watershed during his junior year of college. The first half of his life was soaked in a honey pot, while the second half was entirely broken shards of glass.

In the afternoon, the company gave a temporary notice for a group dinner. He Ning originally didn’t want to go, but the team leader specifically called his name. He intentionally stalled until the very end before going downstairs, leaving him and an unfamiliar colleague from the finance department behind. The two stood at the entrance of the office building staring at each other. Just as He Ning was planning to find an excuse to slip away, a black sedan suddenly pulled up in front of them.

The car window rolled down, and Wen Junhe said expressionlessly, “Get in.”

He Ning stood on the spot, thinking silently to himself how he managed to be this unlucky every single time.

He Ning could feel Wen Junhe’s gaze linger on him briefly for a second before quickly shifting his eyes away, as if they truly were just unacquainted superiors and subordinates.

This was for the best, He Ning thought.

He Ning and the other colleague sat in Wen Junhe’s car, both sitting very straight, tacitly remaining completely silent.

He Ning stared blankly at a prominent brand logo in the car, suddenly remembering that during his sophomore year, he also wanted to gift this model of car to Wen Junhe.

But later, Wen Junhe didn’t accept it and threw a massive tantrum. He Ning therefore never brought up the matter again, taking it to drive himself. He had just gotten his driver’s license at that time and was always afraid of hitting the road, so eight out of ten times, Wen Junhe acted as the driver.

He would sit in the passenger seat and announce it was his exclusive spot, and Wen Junhe would scold him for being childish.

What He Ning heard most frequently from Wen Junhe’s mouth was that he was making a scene out of nothing, or that he couldn’t stand his possessiveness. In the past, whenever He Ning saw any man or woman get close to Wen Junhe, he couldn’t wait to go out and assert his dominance.

Later, He Ning thought, where did he get that confidence from back then? Perhaps it was given by his father.

When he was left with absolutely nothing later on, he realized that he couldn’t afford anything.

Later, the car was also seized along with everything else. He Ning thought wildly about why Wen Junhe still wanted to buy this model, given it wasn’t even a classic style.

He Ning thought, could it be that Wen Junhe wanted to place a history of past humiliation right in front of himself, reminding himself every single time he drove?

Aside from this, He Ning couldn’t think of any other reason.

Once they arrived at the restaurant, He Ning and his colleague got out of the car first. The colleague said thank you to Wen Junhe, and He Ning followed along, nodding his head before stepping into the elevator.

The colleague with him was a female intern from the finance department. She said to He Ning, “President Wen is way too handsome and charismatic. I wonder if he has a partner.”

He Ning said, “Probably.”

The colleague asked him, “How do you know?”

He Ning froze for a moment, remembering that last year Han Qing had posted a photo on a social media platform, which was a photo of him and Wen Junhe, along with the woman next to Wen Junhe at the hospital. There were quite a few people around him.

He Ning hesitated for a few seconds before saying, “…President Wen is so excellent, there must be many people pursuing him. How could he possibly be single.”

The female colleague from the finance department nodded. “That’s true.”

In a trance, he remembered that this person once belonged to him.

During the days they were most attached, He Ning had even thought about what to engrave on his tombstone after death just engraving the words “Wen Junhe’s lover.”

Upon entering the restaurant, He Ning discovered that his movements were a step too late again, leaving only seats for three people.

The restaurant was noisy with voices, leaving only three empty seats next to each other. He Ning’s movements were a beat faster. He acted very ungracefully, quickly grabbing a chair and arranging for that girl to sit next to Wen Junhe. Throughout the entire meal, he kept his head down eating diligently, only barely lifting his head when the manager raised a glass for a toast.

The colleagues went one by one to toast Wen Junhe. When it was He Ning’s turn, he stared at the liquid swirling in his wine glass and said dryly, “President Wen, welcome.”

Wen Junhe said thank you pleasantly to everyone else, but when looking at He Ning, he used a scrutiny gaze to watch him. The manager probably didn’t expect Wen Junhe to have this attitude either.

Manager Xu quickly intervened, saying, “Little He, you aren’t driving, right? Toast President Wen with another glass of wine.”

Wen Junhe said, “He came in my car.”

A glass of wine didn’t mean much to He Ning, but he felt suffocated facing Wen Junhe. Was this how Wen Junhe felt when facing him in the past?

Even if Wen Junhe made things difficult for him, he felt it was very normal. This reminded He Ning of an old matter. When he brought Wen Junhe home back then, his father had also embarrassed Wen Junhe. At that time, he probably experienced this exact same feeling of sitting on pins and needles.

He had always believed in the past that Wen Junhe was touched by his sincerity and therefore stayed with him. Only later did he find out that his father had secretly threatened Wen Junhe using the safety of his aunt’s entire family.

How did he dare to extravagantly hope that Wen Junhe would like him even a little bit.

He Ning gripped his wine glass tightly. “President Wen, I toast you.”

After saying that, he drank it all in one gulp. He Ning’s throat burned with pain. Wen Junhe watched him calmly the entire time, then stated one word, “Boring.”

He Ning couldn’t eat during the second half of the meal either. He was a bit allergic to alcohol, and before long, he only felt immense itching all over his body. Over the past few years, He Ning had developed many allergies.

He sent a message to Zhou Ji. Once the dinner gathered concluded and everyone returned individually, He Ning broke away from the main group and walked toward the other side.

Wen Junhe’s gaze kept following He Ning, watching him walk quickly toward an ordinary black sedan in the parking lot.

When the car window slid down, the profile of the man in the driver’s seat could be faintly seen.

Manager Xu followed his line of sight to look over, and Wen Junhe spoke up, asking, “Who is that?”

A colleague opened their mouth and said, “Oh, oh, that is Little He’s partner, coming to pick him up. The two of them are doing great together.”

Wen Junhe asked, “Partner?”

“Yes, his boyfriend seems to work not far from our company. It’s said the two of them are currently saving up money together to buy a house. As expected, most of those who study art are indeed gay.”